I’ve recently (about a month ago, hah!) been back home, to Romania and ever since, I have been trying to figure out if I enjoyed it or not. Now don’t get me wrong, it’s been amazing seeing family and friends but I somehow feel that it would be just as good if they came to visit or we’d go on a holiday together or something of this sort. So I wanted to put this question out there for all you who may be living away from home (be it in another country, city, etc.) : Do you ever feel like a stranger when you go back home?
Because I do. And I sort of felt guilty about it, but then I told myself it’s been almost six years now so it kind of makes sense I felt like that as now I’ve made my own little home away from home here, in the UK. It almost feels like when you try to tidy up your closet and come across your old favourite leather jacket – it’s got that familiar leathery smell with a hint of your perfume ingrained in it, it may be old and battered, but you know every little flaw it’s got and you still feel good when you wear it. however, it doesn’t quite fit that well anymore. I think that’s how I’d describe the way I feel about going home. I’m always really excited and happy and after a few days in I’m less excited and trying to figure what what else to do and who to see next and then I end up not seeing as many people as I wanted, having to wait for others or simply just not feeling like seeing anyone and just wandering around the city by myself. So I feel conflicted as I set out with all these plans and ideas which go to waste and I feel like I could have used that time differently.
I do however, enjoy the wandering the city by myself as I get to see and visit so many new places such as quaint bistros and minimalist coffee shops with amazing coffee and friendly faces. I always end up seeing Bucharest in a different light every time I go back. I guess this time it was a slightly melancholic light with a hint of sadness and bittersweet memories aftertaste that left me feeling this way. I think with age, as priorities change and now that I’m thinking of starting a family of my own, perspectives change.
And on that note, having shared this, it would be really interesting to hear other views and opinions on this matter.